Tina Swithin of One Mom’s Battle, in her video below, provides a clear and accurate description of the family dynamics occurring in parental alienation.
Swithin describes an unhealthy parent’s commission of domestic violence by proxy upon a child in order to weaponize and turn the child against the other, healthy parent. This dynamic is labeled “parental alienation” in the scientific community.
Swithin does not discuss how she determines who the healthy parent is and who the unhealthy parent is. Here you will learn the scientific method relied upon to determine the truths about the healthy and unhealthy parents.
Tina Swithin’s Definition of Domestic Violence by Proxy
Click to watch Swithin’s : Swithin on domestic Violence by Proxy
In this video, Swithin describes behaviors by a parent that meet the criteria of domestic violence by proxy of the child. Swithin’s description is a faithful accounting of the dynamics that occur in parental alienation.
Swithin states:
“Domestic violence by proxy is when the unhealthy parent weaponizes the children to use them to hurt the healthy parent. They may use the children as pawns and spies. They may manipulate their kids to take sides. And they may make them feel responsible for their emotions.
There is a strategic intent to turn the children against the healthy parent. When their efforts are unsuccessful, they call it alienation, enmeshment, or gatekeeping. When they can no longer hurt or control you, they weaponize their children to that.”
I would be hard-pressed to provide a more accurate and more compelling description of the domestic violence by proxy that occurs in parental alienation and which is committed by the alienating parent.
Tina Swithin’s Unscientific Labeling of the Parents
Swithin did not share the method she relied upon to label an unhealthy parent and a healthy parent. In the absence of being informed by a scientifically recognized method to designate each parent, her notions lack merit.
As with all of Swithin’s unscientific notions about alienation, her labeling of the unhealthy and healthy parent is based upon emotional reasoning and numerous logical fallacies.
Licensed Clinicians Rely Upon Science to Make Findings for Domestic Violence and Parental Alienation
Fortunately for children, there are licensed mental health clinicians who are qualified in both parental alienation and in domestic violence. These clinicians have acquired the necessary training, education, and experience to render accurate clinical opinions in these very complex and counterintuitive cases.
These clinicians are informed by the scientific method to identify the unhealthy parent, who is the alienating and abusive parent; and the healthy parent, who is the alienated and protective parent.
These clinicians have numerous times been found by Courts to provide expert testimony that is relevant, informative, probative, and scientific to educate the fact finder in cases of domestic violence and parental alienation.
What Is the Definition of the Scientific Method?
The scientific method is an objective, unemotional, rational systematic process of collecting and evaluating evidence. The process is used to establish facts and truths. The scientific method enables the rendering of accurate opinions regarding the case that is being assessed.
Physician and cognitive scientist, Steven G. Miller, describes a scientific method labeled “Bayes’ rule:
“Bayes’ rule, also known as Bayes’ theorem, is a simple mathematical equation that defines the relationship between a hypothesis and the evidence for that hypothesis. It governs conditional probability—the probability of one thing given another thing—and dictates how to combine and integrate new evidence to update one’s belief in a hypothesis.”
“Clinically, the hypothesis is often a possible diagnosis and the evidence is often a clinical finding. Each piece of clinical information should be combined in accordance with Bayes’ rule. Because it is a mathematical equation, Bayes’ rule implies that clinicians who have the same information should reach the same conclusions.”
The scientific method to make clinical findings requires adherence to several clinical axioms. It further requires avoidance of cognitive errors and logical fallacies.
FURTHER READING: Clinical Reasoning and Decision Making
The Scientific Method Is Not
- Logical fallacies and other cognitive or thinking errors.
- A belief system that lacks support by neutral, quality evidence.
- Speculation devoid of neutral corroboration.
- Intuitive judgments based upon gut reactions or feelings.
- Opinions based upon personal experiences generalized to the larger population.
- Wishful thinking based upon bias.
- Delusional thinking.
Logical Fallacies Committed by Swithin
Ipse dixit – “It’s true because I said so”.
Appeal to consequences -concluding that an idea is true or false because the consequences of it being true or false are desirable or undesirable.
Argument by repetition – repeating an argument over and over again in place of supporting evidence.
Appeal to pigheadedness – refusal to accept a well-proven argument due to stubbornness.
Argument from emotive language – substituting facts for words that stir up emotions.
Base rate fallacy – substituting statistical information with irrelevant, irrational information.
Willed ignorance – refusal to change one’s mind when confronted with conflicting information because of a desire to maintain one’s belief system.
What Evidence Is Relied Upon to Distinguish the Alienating (Unhealthy) Parent from the Alienated (Healthy) Parent?
In 2007, research psychologist, Amy Baker, and clinical social worker Paul Fine identified 17-research-validated behaviors commonly employed by alienating parents.
These 17 behaviors have been replicated in numerous follow-up scientific studies and are accepted in the scientific community to identify an alienating parent. The behaviors are not manifested in non-alienating, separating or divorcing parents.
Baker and Fine’s alienating behaviors meet the criteria of domestic violence and domestic violence by proxy – some of the exact same behaviors that Swithin described above in her video.
The alienated parent, by the definition of alienation, cannot have committed behaviors that meet the criterial of clinical significance for child abuse or neglect – as determined by the scientific method.
FURTHER READING: Assessing Parental Alienation Using the Scientific Method
Alienating Behaviors Meet the Criteria of Domestic Violence & Domestic Violence by Proxy
The Eeny Meeny Alienation Domestic Violence Abuse Wheel is Based Upon the Duluth model of power and control which is relied upon to identify domestic violence perpetrators. The wheel stands for itself.
FURTHER READING: Alienating Behaviors – Domestic Violence Upon the Child
Will the Real Unhealthy Parent Please Stand Up
Steven G. Miller, MD, describes the characteristics of alienating parents in his chapter that I reference above. The following is from Dr. Miller’s chapter:
“While PA certainly is a relationship problem (or set of problems), severe cases are often associated with serious co-morbid psychopathology, particularly on the part of the alienating parent. Therefore, treatment of the relationship problems per se, while necessary, is seldom—if ever—sufficient. Effective intervention invariably requires treatment of both the alienation and any co-morbid condition (such as mental illness or a personality disorder).”
“There is usually co-morbid psychopathology, particularly in the alienating parent. Several authors have observed an increased prevalence of personality disorders, such as antisocial and borderline personality disorders, among severely alienating parents.
“It is therefore not surprising that alienating parents who have antisocial, borderline, or related personality disorders are resistant to treatment for PA, particularly if one understands that such individuals may not react well to ‘looking in the mirror.'”
FURTHER READING: Parental Alienating Behaviors Discussed by an Expert
Will the Real Healthy Parent Please Stand Up
Alienated parents are attempting to manage one family crisis situation after another. They are frequently the victims of false child abuse and child sexual abuse allegations that require financially expensive and emotionally draining defenses.
Alienated must manage extreme rejecting, hostile, and often physically abusive treatment by their children. They must walk the fine line between having a measured response to each new emotional or physical assault and having to set limits on their child’s antisocial behaviors.
Alienated parents are continually confronted with double bind situations that require extremely difficult decisions and choices.
FURTHER READING: The Alienated Parent – Heartaches From Double Binds
Conclusion
Tina Swithin acknowledges the family dynamics occurring in parental alienation. She describes in her video a parent who weaponizes a child against the child’s other parent to hurt that parent and to turn the child against that parent.
Swithin is not informed by the scientific method regarding any of her notions about parental alienation. The result of Swithin’s meritless postings about alienation deprive alienated children from receiving timely protection.
